Coffee and Yoga Love

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Wow! I can’t believe I’ve been away for so long! Honestly, I am ridiculously busy these days. I started a new job, and while I cut back at my Nanny job, I have been working 7 days a week between both jobs! AND I have class and a tiny bit of a life. I am so glad this week is Spring Break! Even though I work every day, I do have a little time to relax since I don’t have to go to school. I may not be on a beach somewhere, but I am thankful I get a little rest!

Where is this new job you ask? Starbucks! I worked for the company for four and a half years and left about three years ago, but in lieu of my 26th birthday (coming in May!) and the need for insurance and a bit more money, I decided to try and go back. I am so excited to be back in the coffee makin saddle!  I have loved coffee since I was quite young, and as I grow older, I have come to realize that, while it tastes amazing,  that isn’t what has kept me hooked or deepened my affection for it all these years. The most wonderful quality of coffee is its uncanny ability to bring people together. Coffee creates community among people who may otherwise have nothing in common. It brings together old friends and new friends alike. We share our lives over coffee. It is magical. Starbucks has always endeavored to be “that third place,” a place that you are comfortable enough to come together and connect. That has been the thing about this company that I have always loved and one of the things I am most excited about now that I am back! I am so thankful to be a part of it again!

Also, I am so excited for April! I have decided to take part in a challenge to Yoga every day, twice a day-morning and evening-for the entire month of April, presented by the one and only Tara Stiles! I came across Tara’s yoga videos on Youtube a few years back and have been a huge fan ever since! She owns a Yoga studio in NYC called Strala Yoga, and one day I hope to go take a class! Tara recently came out with a DVD series entitled This is Yoga and has created a printable calendar for the month of April for whoever wants to transform their lives through yoga! I am taking the challenge! I see it as a way to really test myself and get motivated to be healthier. I keep saying that I need to lose weight and start being healthy, but every time I try, I fail. So, I plan on making this calendar something I see daily, setting yoga alarms, and learning how to discipline myself to be active every single day. I am hoping that by doing this, it will be something I incorporate into my life far beyond the end of the month! I can’t wait!!

SARAH

Self Doubt

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This past week has been filled with work, snow, school, and creating this blog and its first posts (which actually counts as school too! For the next few months at least). Every day, I go to my Bloglovin feed and read through the blogs I love and follow. Since I have started Blue Eyes & Big Dreams, reading my favorite blogs has carried a certain anxiety with it. I find myself comparing and doubting my abilities to create and inspire. I have to constantly step back and remind myself that I am NEW. This is my second post and every single one of the bloggers I follow started where I did. DUH! I remind myself that this will take time-it will take time for me to come into my own, it will take time for me to figure out all the aesthetics and make my blog what I truly want it to be, and it will take time to gain new followers. The latter I am pretty solid on. I’ve read enough blog “how-to’s” to know they will come and I shouldn’t make my blog all about bringing in the readers. I want this to mean something, to inspire someone. I swear if one person gets something out of my blog, I will have succeeded.

Self doubt is one of my many struggles, and I know I am not alone. Self doubt can be crippling; it can hold us back from being absolutely brilliant and can keep us from doing the things we really want to do. Don’t compare yourself to others, be YOU. I found a quote while browsing Pinterest a while back that I try to remember daily; Pastor Steve Furtick, the founder of Elevation Church in Charlotte, North Carolina, said, “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” This struck me immediately. I read other blogs, and feel I will never come close to the heart and success they have; I take a superficial look at other peoples lives and wonder how they are so put together, while I sometimes feel as though I am on a slow moving path to mediocrity. What I don’t ever think about while I am letting the jealousy and comparison set in, is why I am where I am. I have made choices and there are consequences, be them  good or bad, and I am where I am because of that. God is working in my life, or trying to if I would just let him. I cannot look at other peoples lives and think less of my own. I do not know what goes on in their “behind-the-scenes.” Maybe they have it all figured out, but I highly doubt that. Even the most successful people I know compare themselves to others, I am sure of it. I don’t think I will ever have it all together. And I know I can’t without God on my side. Will you strive with me to not let comparison steal your joy? God created you as you are and He loves you because you are you! He understands your insecurities, but does not want you to wallow in them. They are so minuscule in comparison to His love for you. And if God, the Creator of the Universe LOVES you just the way you are, why would you want to be like anybody else? He created you for a purpose! I have no idea what my Purpose is yet, but I am trying to let God in and let Him lead me to it.

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       Oh yes, I am ending this post with a picture of my lunch! Who knew eating CLEAN could taste so good? This Everything Lentil Soup, is SO yummy, filling, and seriously comforting. It comes from one of my FAVORITE bloggers, Tasha, “The Clean Eating Mama.” She has been so genuine with me and all her readers, has some really great inspiration, and totally delish clean eating recipes! Check her out! Thank you again for stopping by and taking this life journey with me! People need people…community…accountability. I hope this can be something of that, and a bit of inspiration for you, as we try to figure this all out together.

SARAH

Fixing My Eyes

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On tonight’s mid-season premiere of The Walking Dead, Rick really came to head with the realization that he is losing control. If you don’t watch the show, I sincerely urge you to do whatever you can to watch the first 2.5 seasons as soon as humanly possible. I hate zombies (literally have a serious irrational fear here) and I LOVE the show! I bring it up because I don’t think he is alone in his realization (yes, I know he is a fictional character, but I have a tendency to relate fiction to my real life…sometimes it comes in handy :) ). See, I think too many times we feel we need to have it all together, and one day, we look around and wonder what the hell has happened, and ask ourselves why our lives are spinning out of control. We, like Rick, get so caught up in the day to day things we need to get done (you know, like killing zombies and saving our friends from that asshole “The Governor”), that we don’t give ourselves time to process everything that has been going on in our lives, and then BAM! it hits you like a ton of bricks….and you fall apart. I have been trying to cling to the love and Grace I know I have in my Jesus, while at the same time asking all the questions I never asked all the years I believed so innocently. I’ve never been big on trust, so, I’m sorry its taking me so long God. He is the only one who can lead me and it is He whom I must fix my eyes on if I want order and control. See, my favorite TV shows may just be stepping stones to my bigger picture-and clearly it doesn’t relate entirely.

Welcome! I hope you stay awhile and soak in all the beauty and questions and rawness that is life with me. Not every post will be so deep-you will get quite the variety! I will leave you with a link to one of my faves, Lauren Conrad’s Sneak Peek at her new Kohl’s Spring line! I can’t wait to go shopping for Spring! Its my favorite season, maybe because I was born in May, but mostly because the weather is perfect!! Enjoy!

SARAH